Owed to Moose

28 Jul 2016 Owed to Moose

This one is for me, its for my best mate Moose and I!

I haven’t seen him yet, I’m in the air, somewhere over NSW, but I know he isn’t there anymore. The big black, laid back, super calm shadow of me, for twelve years is no longer there. For twelve years he has followed me absolutely everywhere. If I changed rooms so did he, if it was my dinnertime, it was his as well and when I went to bed he would lay on the rug beside the bed and sleep as well, as close as he could. Words that come to mind are loyalty, forgiving and loving.

Moose and the moulting penquin.

No one could ever want to spend this much time with one person, no one could ever want to spend this much time with me, and perhaps no one ever has. When you live alone you really appreciate this kind of love. You appreciate the way a dog will come and sit closer when you’re not feeling well. The kindest soul there was, the way he looked at me if I was sad, or left the room in disapproval if I was angry, its all he needed to do. No words, no sound, just a look, that’s the dog’s way. Its unconditional, they take you as you are, good and bad and love you for it.

Twelve years ago, this coming September, Jaz and I found this little black dog with big feet, one blue eye and one brown eye, at the local RSPCA. He had been de-sexed, there would never be another, and I think that was a shame in way. He was 14 weeks old, they told us he would be huge, we wanted him anyway, and just as well, because he was huge, huge in character, huge in love and huge in creating smiles. I always said it, “everyone loves Moose” and how couldn’t you, he was calming, fun and sort of majestic. It was meant to be, he was already purchased, but we left our name and number and were called that night, the purchaser pulled out and “Buddy” at the time, was ours.

Home at his new place for one day. 

Buddy became Moose, I don’t know where the name came from, but there was no debate, it was perfect.

For the next 12 years I was asked, one hundred times a day “what breed is he”? We never actually knew but I would just say “Husky-Rottweiler cross”, but it didn’t matter to me, he wasn’t even a dog, he was my mate. He was so not a dog, he didn’t even bark, almost never made a sound. All that mattered was that he wanted to be there with me no matter where I was, or what I was doing.

We brought Moose home and I stated “he is an outside dog”. For maybe two hours he stood at the backdoor and looked at us through the glass. Ever since, he was an inside dog. With his own lounge, and several big Moose pillows, he was family, he did as he pleased, but somehow still knew how to fit in. The lounge access started when I was away, he swindled my house sitter into thinking the lounge was his, I respected that and let him win. He even tried it with the bed once, the house sitter thought it was allowed, pretty smart I say, but that was too much, he would’ve taken up the whole thing.

The pink pillow - one of many.

The hardest thing for me right now is that I wasn’t there with him at the end, like he has always been there for me, when I needed a mate. When running and sometimes thinking lonely thoughts, he would read my mind and come to run beside me, it was as if he knew.

If I was away for a day, I would miss him and I know he missed me. But now there is guilt, because his best friend wasn’t there at the end for him. I feel guilty because it was peaceful for him, that’s our dream, and he enjoyed his life right to the end, yet I think of my loss.

Twelve years old and full of life

It was only Thursday that I took this image of him running. His life was full and privileged, he socialized daily with his dog mates and people admirers. Dogs with anger were given a wide birth, that wasn’t him, so wise, I think people could learn from him.

Yet I am selfish, because I am without him now. I should be happy that he passed in his sleep, and ran on his beach to see the sunrise in his final days. Though I think about my life, working on the lounge tonight, without him curled up beside me. That is not right. I should be happy that I knew him.

I owe it to you Moose, if the world was more like Moose we would have no problems, we would be happy, forgiving, loyal to others and always happy. Thank you for teaching me, my wise old dog.


........Forward 3 days, I still awake expecting to see him waiting for me to get out of bed and hit the beach, or greeting me at the car. Honestly, only a dog can think you're that amazing and want to know what you're doing every minute of every day, I appreciated it. I also appreciate the group of people who came to help me bury him and share stories of the times Moose made us laugh. That’s special!

As I complete the hardest words I have ever written, I think about you Moose and admire the impact you had on so many people.

Its for you Moose, I miss you, you are a champion

Paul Hellier - Founder

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